HONESTY MONTH: DAY 12: “If you are honest with yourself, your life will be so much more pleasant.”― Jessica Zafra
I have a gift that can also be uncomfortable to own sometimes. I have almost instant insight into people. As a therapist and long-time counselor in treatment settings, it is a gift. I see through others in what can be uncomfortable ways.
This has saved my butt on so many occasions. And been a great source of irritation to those who have a game to play. Some of my clients have truly hated me for it. They had big games to play. Others are not comfortable with me, because they know I can see what they want to hide, most often from themselves. It is less important that we be honest with each other than it is that we be honest with ourselves. I can fool others and it won’t hurt me nearly as much as when I con or fool myself. That is trickster (Coyote) medicine in one area of my practices. And it truly hurts me when I allow myself to be tricked by me.
Not only is it more pleasant to live with self-honesty, but it is also vital to recovery. The lies I tell me can be seriously dangerous if they continue.
I had fun last week with a day of being in my shit. I was doing some of my oldest behavior thinking and went quite far-afield in my own insanity for about 8 or 9 hours. By the end of that time, I had to sit down with me and have a long chat (which is what I call my writing/inventory process). It was really funny because I got SO caught up in the story I was creating. What happens for me is that it cannot be sustained because I have dug into this stuff for so long and so deeply. My spirit just puts out an alert bell and I hear it. Thank you Spirit!
So, I cleaned up my thinking and began to turn it back into the realm of where truth lies. What was I up to? No good, for sure. But the real miracle here is that I took no action on any of the insanity and it was only with me for a few hours. And I had the best time! Because there were no prices to pay and nothing to clean up, except my thinking. Thank goodness I know how to do that one very well. Yay!