April 4

HONESTY MONTH: DAY 4: “Nobody will ever take you serious in life, until they know that your yes is yes and your no is no.”― Bamigboye Olurotimi

So many of us are people pleasers who do not know how to give a definitive answer to questions. Some of them are ridiculously simple, yet some folks struggle to state their honest truth.

Social demands that we be “nice” all the time mean that a great deal of dysfunction exists at the level of interpersonal relationships. It takes years for some to learn to say something in the face of unwanted or unappreciated behaviors by others.

We seethe inside around what others do or say in our presence, yet feel incapable of telling them so. It is really horrifying when these are people with whom we have long-term relationships that are supposed to be based on honesty.

Passive-aggressiveness is a serious issue for the undermining and degeneration of trust and integrity. I do not believe those who smile and laugh at all the wrong times and at all the wrong things. They are sad because they don’t have the strength of character to just say and be who they are. It is more important to them to pretend to like others and to just “get along.” They are doing neither of the two. It (passive-aggressive behavior) used to be a diagnosable mental illness, and is a truly bad way to interact with others.

This is what happens when we place our image over our responsibilities to tell the truth. To be honest and integral is truly the most important feature of our character. How can we trust anyone who isn’t able to just be authentic?

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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