FAITH MONTH: DAY 14: “I live in the faith that there is a Presence and Power greater than I am that nurtures and supports me in ways I could not even imagine. I know that this Presence is All knowing and All Power and is Always right where I am”― Ernest Holmes
During a challenging time of deep learning, when I was about 9 or 10 years into this recovery thing, I read a great deal of Mr. Holmes’ material. He fascinated me, as did his brand of faith. This quote was one I used to have pasted in a place where I saw it often.
The more challenging times in my life were those where my faith was tested. Either “God is everything, or He is nothing” as the BB states. I always believe my life is falling apart, but it is during these times that I am being strengthened in ways that I do not understand while they are happening. All I know is that I found a wonderful used book store, and they had a lot of really good spiritual material that I had never had time to read before. This quote was my goal in those days. To hold on to a faith in this fashion was so appealing, and I knew mine was very shaky.
The phrase here, “Power greater than I am” is part of the reason early AA creators used the phrase for those people who came in filled with doubt about “God.” Mr. Holmes was very popular in the 1920s and 1930s when the world was filled with scary events. I like to believe that this quote was where they got the idea that it could be a personal Power we could use when our faith in “God” was scarce or gone altogether.
We all need that, I believe. The idea that “something out there” is in charge. And this quote is a great goal for us to hang our hearts on because we can live and breathe this kind of faith. It is what I have in my life today. Not always the case, but I do know how it began and how it grew. My faith came when there was nothing left for me to hold onto. Not a minute before, but right on time. It is a growing, alive and living thing that I hope I never lose. It is my joy and happiness to hang onto, even on the darkest days.