FAITH MONTH: DAY 13: “Real change is difficult at the beginning. Without the familiar to rely upon, you may not in as much command as you had once been. When things are not going your way, you will start doubting yourself. Stay positive, keep the faith, and keep moving forward – your breakthrough may be just around the corner.”― Roy T. Bennett
I need to change the word “difficult.” Real change is NOT difficult. It is uncomfortable, unusual, new, and different. That is all. We only make it difficult by resisting.
Our familiar when we begin the recovery journey is the pain of living consistently at the bottom, and we insist on digging in and staying there. Making any change is going to challenge us to let go of resistance and move in another direction. Even our pain is familiar. We insist on keeping it as a reliable old friend. It is neither.
Because we love to be in control, we will resist things that are not created by our ego and that is the reason for relapse and chronic addiction. Ego. Every time, all the time.
Having faith means we step out of what is comfortable and move into unknown, uncomfortable life situations. We seldom really believe they are going to work out, but the pain of staying the same is greater than our disbelief. That is all that is needed.
I love my sponsees, who always tell me I am crazy when I suggest something to them that has worked for me. Then, a week later, they act like it was all their idea to begin with and are so busy patting themselves on the back that they don’t even know how hard I am laughing. God bless us all! We really need to believe we are still the controlling force behind our successes. Yeah, right!
Well, I don’t need credit. My best ideas and a huge ego got me here. None of that has served me once since it began. All my resistance has created some big pain for me. Period. I have never found an answer for a spiritual life. I have been blessed with just enough Grace to stick it out, without drugs and alcohol, for this period of time. I am amazed, more than anyone. What a gift. And I never once had anything happen because it was difficult. But, boy oh boy, can it be uncomfortable! Hahahaha…yeah, right!