DISCIPLINE MONTH: DAY 10: “Discipline isn’t a dirty word. Far from it. Discipline is the one thing that separates us from chaos and anarchy. Discipline implies timing. It’s the precursor to good behavior, and it never comes from bad behavior. People who associate discipline with punishment are wrong: with discipline, punishment is unnecessary.” ― Buck Brannaman
This quote is an old friend for me. I had it over my desk in a work setting in a treatment program. The clients hated when I talked to them about “accountability” and “discipline” because they did not understand why those things were necessary in recovery.
I believe in laying out the foundation of recovery in the very early days. When I work with a client or a sponsee, one of our first conversations will always be about accountability and then discipline. I don’t know another way to stay sober. So, I only teach what I do and what I know.
A lot of clients and sponsees believe they have a better idea or plan for their recovery. I let them know, usually right away, that it won’t work like that with me. And they agree and off we go. Many times, I have had them tell me what a mean and nasty bitch I am. (Tis true!) No false advertising here. But when they consistently don’t want to do what I do, I just let them know it is time to call someone else.
This is not an easy thing, because I would love to let them continue to call and pretend to work with me, but I know better.
Nothing will allow recovery to flourish like doing the right thing and doing it consistently, no matter what I think or how I feel. Those are old ideas anyway.
And since they didn’t work prior to recovery, I am certain they will not work in recovery. In fact, the exact opposite is true. They will only DESTROY recovery.
This is a great tool. Knowing what works and what doesn’t is the golden key to this great life we have. It is so simple we just don’t want to get it. We love complex mazes and confusing jargon, because then the ego can play in there and hide in the dark spaces.
Simple works. And I love this quote, because I lived in chaos and anarchy. They are the epitomic definition of addiction for me…CHAOS AND ANARCHY. Isn’t that just great?
Dolphin Hug 