April 20

HONESTY MONTH: DAY 20: “I tried to manipulate and control people and I harbored resentment. I wanted to be forgiven but I wouldn’t forgive others.”― Lauryn Hill

I thought of SO many people when I read this…old clients, sponsees, and one sponsor, who eventually went out again after 22 years. A good example in so many ways for me.

We all have some of this in us. I know I do. And then I have to work through the resentments again, allowing those who may have done things I do not condone (for whatever reason) to remain neutral in my heart and mind.

I do not really believe in “forgiveness”. Never have. I believe that is in the realm of impossible for earthly beings and more what can happen with the Power, not with me. I receive that Grace, but cannot produce it. Nor, do I believe, can other earthly beings. So I use the word “acceptance” instead. And yes, I can practice radical and unconditional acceptance of others, no matter who they are or what they have done.

I have the ability to see the path of others with very soft eyes and heart. That has always been my gift. It allows me to radically and unconditionally accept that others have a path I may not understand and do not want to replicate, but I CAN accept them…without question.

Especially when they are in the process of working through their “stuff” and striving for betterment of themselves. Great!!! If they are not, then I still accept them, but keep a very wide berth. All good. We are all on our journey. I just do not want to travel with some as our paths are divergent.

I love this quote, though, because it keeps me mindful of what I am here to do. Just me, and no matter what.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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