December 31

LOVE MONTH: DAY 31: “I sought to hear the voice of God and climbed the topmost steeple, but God declared: “Go down again – I dwell among the people.”― John Henry Newman

This is a great quote to end the month of love. It brings up old ideas for me. Having survived so much trauma early in life, I was distrustful and suspicious about people.

I learned to survive in ways that were immature and inappropriate and have had to spend many years unlearning those methods.

One of my most often-used tools is to isolate. If people hurt me, I just withdraw and hide out. That is an old, old idea that is certainly not going to work. For, in isolation, I am not having those amazing moments of connection with others. They are the thing that creates life inside of us.

My work in this world is all about connection. So I have had to learn how to connect meaningfully with those I need to and let the rest go about their business.

I have to practice this all the time. In current times, I am saddened and deeply discouraged at human behavior in the world around me. I do not get to interface with more than a small handful of people in person, but when I do go out into the world, the ugliness and fear of the behaviors I encounter is horrifying and I want to isolate again.

I must learn, again and again, to focus not on those people, but the ones who are doing what they do with courage and grace and love. The people who are working with others who are sick, the ones who are doing what they do to create solutions in this time, the people who are healers and good people, not the ones who are acting out like two-year olds or angry and aiming it at the rest of us. I must always see God in others, not their temper tantrums. This is an ongoing challenge for me. And I love what happens when I do get to connect well and deeply with a good person. There are many in my life and more get added all the time. This is so good to know. Healing in so many ways!

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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