June 21

HUMILITY MONTH: DAY 21: “The only humility that is really ours is not that which we try to show before God in prayer, but that which we carry with us, and carry out, in our ordinary conduct; the insignficances of daily life are the importances and the tests of eternity, because they prove what really is the spirit that possesses us.”― Andrew Murray

We all know when we are in the presence of great Ego and when we are in the presence of true humility. It shines through the person and onto everyone and everything around them. It is such a gift to be in that presence.

As I learn that difference in myself and it becomes more expressed in the world around me, others are aware more often about the path I walk. I don’t need to be the prettiest, smartest, coolest, or any “est” person around. That is so different.

Oddly, those who live in Ego are so afraid of their place in the scheme of things that they overcompensate. It is terribly sad, because we can all see through their puffed up attitude to the frightened person who lives behind the mask of superiority. They strive so hard to convince others of their superiority that they exhaust themselves and others just to be around them.

I have been that person, terrified that others would find out what was really wrong with me and how much wrong was there. Then I got this gift, this amazing step to work on. It gave me a balance. I cannot sit with only my character defects, but also with the things that are okay with me. The things that are strengths.

When I work with others, I always want them to recognize the strengths they have that are going to pull them out of the abyss of morbid self-reflection and detestation that addicts live with. That is all Ego anyway. We are just not that big a deal. Nothing about us is really earth-shattering, but Ego says it all is. Learning humility is the acceptance that there are qualities we love in ourselves and behaviors we don’t love so much. All we do is focus on the first and ask for help in getting rid of the second. It can be done.