January 23

ACCEPTANCE MONTH: DAY 23: “No tree tries to become a certain kind of tree. No flower tries to become a certain kind of flower. The tree and the flower open up to the sun and soak up water. Thus, they grow into themselves. No judgment. No expectations. No commentary. Your task is the same. If you can stop trying so hard to become who you think you should be, and instead commit to understanding and nourishing yourself, you will bloom into whatever kind of person you are.” – Vironika Tugaleva

Acceptance of self is the longest spiritual journey we take. So many people are working overtime to be other than they are. Prodding and cramming themselves so full of information or the newest this or that. Working on altering the outside or the brain to be other than what they are here to be.

For my part, I believe recovery is about losing this shit. Dropping the Ego and BEING who we are. Letting go of superficial appearances and moving into the space where we sit in spirit and everything else falls away.

So much spiritual literature speaks to this. I remember when I was reading 10 or 11 books at a time and studying like a maniac to become spiritual. A friend said to me one day…”Leave Kelly alone. She has all she needs and is all she ever needs to be.” OH! Really?

I had to sit with that. I was 3 years into this recovery thing at the time and working so hard to find the magic words, the magic key. To understand a spiritual way of life. It isn’t about that. No teacher, no book, no guru, no magic yoga position, no rock or combination of them, no sacred smoke; none of these is going to do it for you. Understanding a spiritual life is not living one.

In fact, there is nothing to read or say or chant or do. It is in the loss of ALL of this that we stop working on it and allow ourselves to just BE in it.

Ego is what is driving that fearful searching, the desperation. It is quite awful to watch others do this, and the reason for that is that we know we are doing the same thing. If we believe ourselves to be unlovable, we are. If we believe we are richly blessed and filled with Divine Love and Grace, we are. We get to determine the extent to which we are grasping for Ego or losing ourselves in Love.

Recovery is about letting go of Ego, finding out who we are and recognizing the roadblocks to spirit. We cannot build a path there; we have to uncover the path there. No one has the map; it is IN you. The old saying is, “uncover, discover and discard.” Nowhere does it say, find more information, assemble all the world’s information and disseminate, critique, analyze and gather. That is not the way to spirit. It is the way of Ego.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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