December 23

LOVE MONTH: DAY 23: “I have decided to stick to love…Hate is too great a burden to bear.”― Martin Luther King Jr.

If there is something that must surely break our hearts into shattered pieces, it is that we carry resentment, anger and hatred in our bodies. It has been shown scientifically to cause diseases that are deadly to the human body…cancer, heart disease, diabetes, and all myriad conditions of the stomach and digestion.

Our bodies cannot tolerate carrying these things within us. It is not part of our journey to do this. We are here to learn physically, spiritually, emotionally and mentally to love and accept Life in every form. That is not, however, how Ego works, so we get lost in Fear. Ego/Fear are the creators of resentment, anger and hatred. These are, literally, like me taking poison and waiting for you to die from it. Ugh!

These are formed when Ego tells a story around what happens in our lives and our self-centered view of life. Most of the time, we attach ourselves to events, ideas and stories that have little or nothing to do with us. Other times, we interpret the stories of things that take place in our narrow view and refuse to open up to what may be another point of view or perspective. A wise man has maintained throughout his long, long-term sobriety that addiction is a disease of perception.

The steps are the antidote to these things. Why? Because we learn to reframe OUR point of view and perspective and open our minds to another way of seeing ALL of Life with a new set of eyes, from another perspective. Then our perceptions open up to a broader view of life and we are off the hook from all those things.

We let go of anger, resentment and hatred of others and allow and accept Life on its own terms, which is a saving Grace for everyone. When we know of others’ inability to have done life any differently than how they do it, we can stop hating and resenting them. We are not qualified to judge any of it. And anything that is done to me is really a gift, because my own recovery will be deeper and more significant due to that event. I may thank that person and move on. My body will recover from this event or idea too. I love that!

Deep and total acceptance may be the only form of love I can offer some folks. I have learned that. I love them on the basis of that understanding and let go of my anger and resentment. But this takes a great deal of work on my part. I have had to do that, again and again. I still have Ego and story around things, but it takes less and less work and there is less and less anger and resentment, because I have done that work. Healing and recovery are the greatest of all life’s gifts for me.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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