LOVE MONTH: DAY 2: “In your light I learn how to love. In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest where no-one sees you, but sometimes I do, and that sight becomes this art.”― Rumi
I feel like this when I am outdoors in Nature. I feel this and could never explain it, but there are times when I want to hug Universal Power so tight, because I am so in love with the works created. It makes me sad that so many people never see it…this beautiful marble we live on. They never go out of their rooms or homes to experience the majesty of a big storm or the ocean when it is whipped up in fury. They never smell the scent of the woods when you hug Cedar or Sequoia trees.
I never expected to feel this so fully in my life. I was so dead inside. My last dog that I had before I got into recovery was a beautiful Old English Sheepdog named Norman. I loved that dog so deeply. He and I gardened in the house where I lived. I was home during the days, but went out every night and someone stole him about a month before I went into recovery. Norman was my soul mate during that time. He was the only creature I could cling to and feel love for. I was so broken and desperate during that time. I was so suicidal and sad. Nature and animals have always been my link to the Power. I can always feel that way with them. But there was nothing in Nature that spoke to me then. I was too locked up inside myself and my addiction. Norman was the dude!
He would stand on his hind legs and put both of his front paws on my shoulders and lick my face for as long as I would let him. And I would brush him for hours because he always needed it and it made him so happy!. What a great dog he was for me. I know someone stole him, because he would go with anyone and did not have a mean bone in his body. Just tons of love.
One night I came home, and he was gone. I truly did not know how to live without some evidence that I was loved. I soon attempted suicide and was picked up and taken to a recovery home…that was a bigger love that I did not understand, but today I feel and know very well.
There have been other dogs, but that feeling has been with me forever. I have been loved so much since that time. But I know the love of Norman saved me. And the love of the Universal Power is with me in full force ever since. It comes in the woods, it comes on the beach, it comes in my gardens, and it always comes in animals and birds and sometimes even people. Always been like that. What a tremendous blessing this world is to explore and love and be loved in.