July 16

PATIENCE MONTH: DAY 16: “There is something good in all seeming failures. You are not to see that now. Time will reveal it. Be patient.” ― Swami Sivananda

One of my personal gurus, so I really love this piece. I am never to see what is being built in me. That I have certainly learned since coming to this place. I even knew it long before recovery. I was given so much experience in that on my way here.

There was a great deal of synchronistic energy around even coming here. It was not an awareness I had that drugs and alcohol were at the end of their purpose in my life. THAT certainly did not appear on my radar. But others knew. They could see. And what is really sad is that those people were all loaded too. They just knew something I did not.

That is always the case for us, isn’t it? I know that I am always the last one to know what is happening for me. Others see so much that I cannot. I am grateful for the blinders of denial that I get until I am ready to accept things that need healing in me. It would have been too much to bear to get this information all at once. I did not know what doors I was opening in those first early days. Thank goodness! It has been a tremendous ride and so much learning happens!

Every time I failed to get what I thought was the next thing for me, I have been so happy to get what came instead. There is no doubt in my mind that each opening where I tried to fill my life for myself was filled in a manner so much more suitable and beautiful than anything I could have created. I am happy to say I am not the person to know what is coming, but I always feel the shifts coming before they do.

There is a sense of completion and opening in my life every time.

I even had that before I got here. It was a void that I knew I could not fill. A space where life felt completely untenable for me. That was the way it always came then, and now.

And the Universal Power always gives me road markers that indicate when the path is the right one and I am going where I need to go. It is amazing how that works…I love it!

I do not believe I have ever failed at anything. There have been some sharp left turns, even big U-turns, but they always put me back on the path I am supposed to be walking, so how can that be a failure? I have learned not to judge success or failure, for myself or anyone else. I just see truth and not truth. I love that others must sometimes show me those things as well.

When others show me who they are, I pay attention. I do not need to work to make them someone else. Even when it suits me more. I have learned that a lot in the last few months. It is a righteous lesson today. It put me in a different space; and from there, on another turn to a more perfect path for me. It is interesting how that happens. Always has and always will. I don’t know where it goes, just when my feet are headed where they need to go. I love that too!