June 21

HUMILITY MONTH: DAY 21: “The chief means of resisting manipulation is humility – knowing who we really are and facing it. You can only serve by love. You can only love by choice. True love cannot be the result of decree, force or manipulation.” ― Gayle D. Erwin

We are all susceptible to manipulation by others, when we are in Ego and allow them to puff us up with flattery and smooth talking. Most of us are well-versed in this as well. It is the exchange of energy that is present in codependence. And it feels icky and it creates an icky environment.

Humility keeps me in truth and grounded in saying only those things to another person that I see as true and real from my perspective. I do not give out flattery to others, but I do recognize their good qualities. Especially when I am having difficulty with some of their other qualities. I have learned to focus on the things that are good and fine in people. I try to tell them what I see, rather than being a critical or judgmental person. None of us grows that way.

We are called to practice loving others. For me, this means that I let them off the hook regarding expectations and demands or agendas. They can decide what they want to do in all situations, when I am in balance emotionally and spiritually.

I can stand down from the needy demands I have had made upon me, as well as those I have made on others when my emotional and spiritual life was circling the drain. I was so empty at those times. It hasn’t happened in a long time for me, but I know how horrible it feels.

So, instead of asking for love from others, it is our job to give it. All the love in the world resides within me and you. We give it out and become filled up. The more we pour out, the more there is. We have just created a world where there is more love available by adding to it, not demanding it or absorbing it from others like a sponge.

And it must come from a loving and unconditional place to be love. Acceptance is the biggest part of real love.

And, I must pour it into me as well. That is where I begin. I love me and then there is so much more for me to give to you and you and you and you. It doesn’t stop like that. It goes on and on and on and on. I love this shit!

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

Leave a comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s