April 18

HONESTY MONTH: DAY 18: “To believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

This is such a huge statement for me. I recognize all the many aspects of my own dishonesty here. I am quite dishonest in many ways. I want to be a much better person than I am currently being.

I want to live more integrally with those aspects of spiritual expression than I do today. My own journey is to work toward complete integrity with my beliefs.

If I believe in a simple and sustainable life, I have to learn to live more simply, with a great deal less than I currently do. Sadly, I love things, pretty things. This means I have a bigger home than I really need. I have a tendency to plant flowers that use water, even though I want to live more simply and use fewer of the resources of my planet.

I can always do more to save on consumption. I get caught in the dynamic of ego, wanting things and getting them when I can.

I believe strongly in the world around me and its natural state of beauty. I do not always adhere to the best practices for maintaining this world. I have a carbon footprint that can always be diminished. I want to practice Ahimsa more thoroughly and not use products that hurt my water supply or the environment.

There is always progress to be made. The man who made this statement lived only with a cloth for protection and sandals. I would love to be able to do that. It is not part of my current lifestyle, but it would be okay if it were. I respect and admire those who only consume what is essential, eschewing all other aspects of unnecessary products. What a gift! What a great way to be! I am still working to balance the two aspects of my nature to be more at peace with all of my choices. Perhaps this will allow me to truly do no harm. To live without gasoline or other petroleum products.

I see the hypocrisy in my life. I am not happy with that. But am, today, unwilling to give it all up. I don’t know where this goes. Every spiritual tradition I truly embrace speaks to these ego-fueled ideas and the lifestyle of a culture that is out of control and has destroyed the ecosystem of this planet. I cannot be unmindful of that.

I see my dishonesty and lack of integrity with all of this. It is my intention to do more to line up on the side of my heart, not my head. To do more, to be more aligned with the principles I truly hold. Each day is a work of this kind of progress. To need and want less. To give back more. This is all I strive for. To become as soul-fully honest as I can become.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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