December 18

LOVE MONTH: DAY 18: “We are not trapped or locked up in these bones. No, no. We are free to change. And love changes us. And if we can love one another, we can break open the sky.” ― Walter Mosley

And we do break open the sky. There is a great deal of love in this Universe. It is there because it is in the creation of all of it.

The challenge for us is to open ourselves to this love. To stop allowing the ego to dictate life to us and to allow Love to take over.

That is truly the purpose of these 12 steps. The only purpose. It ain’t about drinking or drugging. It is about the way that Ego-filled lives are never going to be successful in love or life or any of it. There is no joy, only addiction without this kind of spiritual existence.

I have so many friends who consider themselves “sober” who are so miserable and unhappy. They do not understand that this is a spiritual malady. Truly understanding that means that you don’t run to a meeting when you feel out of connection. You run to the practices that bring you spiritual connection. I may feel that for a moment in a good meeting, but it is not the Source. People in meetings just talk about the Source. Most of them are lost too, in my experience.

So, I go to the Source. One-on-one, face-to-face, in the quiet where the Ego has no Power. Sometimes I lay down on the floor, sometimes I hit my cushion, sometimes I sit in the sand on a beach, it does not matter. All I need to do is bring my heart and get quiet.

The love lives in there…in the quiet…in my heart. It ain’t in a book, it ain’t in a meeting, it ain’t in a new car or a new home or in anything. My heart, and quiet. The opposite of what most folks are busy doing. It ain’t in a mosque or a church or a temple. I may find the quiet there that I need to access my heart, but I find it is better if I am somewhere I can listen to the silence.

And then we pass this on. But, as MY bb tells me…”you cannot transmit something you haven’t got. SEE TO IT that your relationship with ___ is right.”

See to it. Have we talked about that recently? I don’t think so. If I needed 3 words to sum up the whole program (all of them!), there it is…See to it. That is ALL we are here to do. That is ALL we need to know. 3 simple words. And then we all run around, going here and there to GET IT…reading this, reading that, writing and working and talking…my God, the talking…ego spouting shit all over the floor…geez!

Just See to it…and then get on with channeling that love. You don’t have it in you until you clear out the shit of the ego…like everything…then you can channel the love. Find the Source…and See to it that you stay in the flow of the Source. That’s it…too simple for any of us to figure it out…sigh!

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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