December 16

LOVE MONTH: DAY 16: “A purpose of human life, no matter who is controlling it, is to love whoever is around to be loved.” ― Kurt Vonnegut

I did not expect to find a good love quote from Mr. Vonnegut. I have always loved his sense of life, but he did not write straight-up things about love. I love his views on integrity, honesty, etc., but not much did I expect from him about love.

This one really makes me happy. It takes all that drama out of looking for our long-lost soulmate kind of love that buries so many people in the sand.

Some of us are not going to have life-long mates. I certainly did not expect it, even though I did a lot of looking, in all the wrong ways, in all the wrong places, and with all the wrong men, for companionship, one night at a time. Lol!

That old-fashioned concept of a partner or mate with whom to “trudge the road to happy destiny” is not going to happen for an awful lot of people. Truth is, most of the married people with whom I am familiar would just as soon be on their own if they could.

Not all. I have a couple of friends who have made their lives happy with a partner. But I think that idea is not very well-based in reality for most of us.

I enjoy having a friend or two with whom to go to movies and a nice meal. While there is a physical side to a love-relationship that can be nice, there is so little of that for most of those who are still in a relationship that I doubt it happens as much as any of us would like anyway.

So, we are supposed to just love the people who are around. That makes it easier doesn’t it? I had a business transaction yesterday with a pharmacist who was waiting on me as I purchased a Christmas gift. His store is one of those old-fashioned Rexall stores in the little town where I now live. (Isn’t that quaint?) And I try to do business there often, because I love it! Anyway, he was so warm and friendly, it took me by surprise for a moment. Imagine that! I remember when everyone you met in stores and with whom you did business was pleasant and kind. Now it surprises me.

Sad. We could all use a lot more love and kindness. Perhaps that really is what Step 12 is all about. Just being kind to each other and those who are still drinking. Suspend judgment about it all and let them all off the hook. I think if I could have what I truly wanted for Christmas, it would be to just feel that love and kindness in my heart for everyone and from everyone. I think that is a great gift for us all.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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