October 12

DISCIPLINE MONTH: DAY 12: “With practice, you build the road to accomplish your goals. Excellence lives in attention to detail. Give your all, all the time. Don’t save anything for the walk home.” ― Ethan Hawke

I like this one. Sometimes I think I am too focused on detail. Everything I do is done to the nth degree, and it can bother those who are shortcut oriented. I am not. I seldom find satisfaction with doing things quickly or with less than my usual focus.

I love to create. Sometimes I want to do projects in a short time and not as completely as I know they need to be completed. But I am never happy with those results. I always know when I do things half way or “good enough” so am not satisfied.

When I go to school, I take all  the extra classes to get the most well-rounded education. I continue to learn each and every day as best I can. I don’t want to have some or most of the information. That is not my way.

When I bake, I am going to use ingredients and bake from scratch. Not a big fan of mixes or boxes or cans. Just not my way.

When I do anything, I am going to do it to the very best of my ability. If I do not know how, I will be sure to educate myself as best I can. I am not afraid to learn from those who have superior knowledge. When I began gardening, I did not just throw things into the ground to see how it went.

I took classes on soil amendments, learning how to feed the ground before I planted the seeds or plants. Then I worked on sun and placement and best components for building beds and tools and all of that. If I do a craft, I learn the best ingredients to use to make things.

This is the way I have been able to learn and develop skills. I am always fascinated by learning new trades, new ways of doing things. I have learned to garden organically, build a website, crochet, sew, embroider, do needlepoint and other needlework of similar types, cook some really amazing foods and types of cuisine, bake using only non-gluten foods, create amazing homes, do all kinds of handyman stuff, and maintain a living space without using toxic or noxious chemicals.

I have lived without television, electricity, cooked without gas or electricity or wood burning (toxin free!), be a pioneer woman who could make everything I needed from scratch…I prefer buying my shoes at retail stores (haha), but I can do all of that. I know how to live on native plants and grow all my own food if I need to. But I do love a good gluten-free pizza and having food delivered to me!

Learning to do this work in the world has been a rich and satisfying experience. I am a balance of these skills today. I want to do what I do well or learn to do it better. I do not settle for “okay” or half-done from myself or those who do work for me. Shortcuts always come back to bite us in the ass, I have learned. In doing this 12-step work, it can be devastating to do things halfway or not at all.

I know I am a perfectionist. It shows in so many ways. I have learned to allow for life to work to soften my nature and allow it to be less than what I think is right sometimes. It is all a cosmic blessing!

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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