April 16

HONESTY MONTH: DAY 16: “The truth is the only thing worth having, and, in a civilized life, like ours, where so many risks are removed, facing it is almost the only courageous thing left to do.” ― Edward Verrall Lucas

Yes! And I use what is called the Serenity Prayer as what I call my Courage Prayer. I have written about this before. I seldom need to pray for serenity if I have prayed for and received courage. Truth and courage are my goals.

When I know what my truths are, I have the information I know to understand what needs to be changed in me and my attitudes, my old ideas, and my behaviors. These are the things I have some power over. These are the things that Step 4 will bring me to again and again.

I don’t often like this narrow-er perspective. I like it when all that is wrong with my life is YOU and YOUR behaviors. Or when I am a victim of life and all its vagaries. Then I can just sit and pout and feel sorry for myself. But, when I realize that I am the perpetrator of my own misfortunate circumstance (great phrase-I just felt a jolt when I wrote it!), then I get to make changes in ME. Ugh!

And so, it goes, on and on, forever! This is powerful stuff! And I love the powerful stuff. I want my recovery to be just what I looked for in my booze and drugs…Straight, Pure, Powerful and Uncut! None of that sissy shit, watered down, mixed with sugar crap, or stepped on.

Give it to me right out of the bottle and as pure as I can get it.

That is Step 4 for me. I don’t want to hear the stories, just the results. Where are we going and what is the MOST DIRECT route to get there? That is where I am going. That is the only road I want to be on. It is great to take the scenic route, but only if you are looking for the fluff. Me, not a big fan. I seldom dawdle unless I am avoiding something. If there is some time to kill, then we will explore and have adventures, but that, for me, is the essential ingredient in life. Full face adventure!

I am not afraid of the truth, it has been my greatest ally and friend. My boon companion. I drank straight booze and I looked for the purest drugs I could find. Why would I do this stuff any differently? And I am, above all, a tremendous fan of risks. They make me laugh…and I love a good dare…how about you?

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

Leave a comment

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s