November 2

GRATITUDE MONTH: DAY 2: “As you get wiser, you’ll realize how lucky you are for everything that happens for you.”― Maxime Lagacé

For you…not TO you. I love that! I realized that one at about 10 or 11 years into this thing. Victims think that everything is happening TO them, and recovery is when you see how it happens FOR you.

Which does not mean much until you change the entire story. If you keep touching the hot stove, it will keep doing that thing it does FOR you, but why do you need to keep touching the damn stove?

Most addicts are perpetual and perpetuating victims. They refuse to learn what their part is in the way life unfolds and are continuously victimized by the same thing, over and over. With a huge tendency to become a martyr to the story they write about it in their heads.

The steps we are supposed to work here will alleviate that. But I know, because I watch this show go down, that there are so few who learn anything from their experiences and just play victim over and over again.

Gratitude for what we are learning is a huge key in changing that dynamic, but the key is no good if you don’t pick it up and learn to use it. It will not open the door on its own. We must do the work, and that is another reason I get what I get, and so many never do.

It ain’t from sitting next to me in a meeting or running to the phone every time a new situation has you acting like a victim again. This stuff is work folks, but the joy is real when you do the work.

Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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