January 30

ACCEPTANCE MONTH: DAY 30: “Life’s under no obligation to give us what we expect.” ― Margaret Mitchell

When we learn to accept this piece of truth, we are going to have a much easier time of life. All of it. We have some entitlement about who we are and how that is supposed to go.

Because ego separates us from our fellows, we believe that we live in a vacuum of self. That creates an ugly, ugly sense of self that makes us ugly, ugly human beings.

We live in ways that are imposing our values (or lack thereof), on others, taking their space and time and energy for granted, because we, quite frankly, don’t even consider them. We are completely self-absorbed and living in a world  of our own making.

This is offensive and off-putting for others. As the BB states, “We trample on the toes of others and they retaliate.” Ugly way to walk in this world.

When there are, literally, billions of us all doing this at the same time, all we are doing is constantly trampling on toes and retaliating with each other. Not a good plan for getting along and enjoying life. It is no one’s responsibility to take care of the messes we make. It is OUR responsibility to do what we say we are going to do and get on with that…WITHOUT trampling on someone else’s toes or expecting them to step in and do it for us.

When we do what we want, without regard for those whose toes we are trampling on, this is the ultimate in selfishness and self-centeredness. An ugly, ugly way of being.

When we do everything to please others, we are co-dependent and manipulative. There is a balance between these two extremes that we need to find.

The world is not here to make us happy. We need to find the best way of being in the world and create our own happiness with that. No one needs to please me. I need to find my pleasure in what is happening with me and for me and to me at all times, without needing a single bit of life to accommodate me or my demands.

This removes obligation from everyone and everything in life. And I can own my own self and happiness without imposing shit on you that you do not step in and take on. Learning these things and accepting what IS instead of what we think it SHOULD be is the road to happiness that is authentic and real.

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Published by: Kelly

I am a therapist and counselor with long-term recovery from addictions and personal trauma. My writing reflects these experiences and the road I have traveled in 12-Step recovery settings, along with the work I have done for over 30 years in the field. My love of dolphins includes the stories of them being healers in places all over the world. I long to offer every broken spirit and body the experience of a healing hug. May my words and stories inform, uplift and delight your spirit and soothe your weary heart.

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