COURAGE MONTH: DAY 26: “My great hope is to laugh as much as I cry; to get my work done and try to love somebody and have the courage to accept the love in return.” ― Maya Angelou
Wouldn’t life be great if we could set intentions such as these and live into them fully each day? We all have these kinds of intentions as we progress through life.
What gets in the way? Our broken perceptions about what life is and is not. (Self-centeredness.) Our insistence on getting our way, even when we step on the toes and feet and ankles of everyone else. (Selfishness.) And our absolute devotion to retaliating against the world for any real or perceived wrongs done to us by others. (Resentment and justification.)
The list is long. However, we truly want to be able to give and receive love. When it is all being showered down on us, we are less than engaged in the most important aspect of life…giving to others. Not because we are coming from a place on high; but because we MUST do that to keep what we get here.
Service and love are only going to work for anyone when they are being given freely to everyone. I cannot love you if I don’t love myself. And, at least for me, I cannot conditionally love a few and not have love in my heart for the rest.
That is just how this thing works. I cannot hang on to resentment and anger and feel good about me or you. It just cannot happen. That space in my heart where love lights me up cannot be even a tiny bit dark, or I have cut myself off from the “sunlight of the spirit.”
There are many people with whom I choose to spend very little or none of my time. That is because I do not particularly care for their habits, lifestyles, beliefs or behaviors. But, I do not allow that to deny them my love. I will love them as they are. That just means I do not have to be around them.
How do I progress into willingness in Step 8? By recognizing the ways that I must love others in order to be doing this thing fully. I don’t get to judge what other people are here to do at this time and in this place. I only get to love them. I may be the only example of Step 12 they get. And that means that EVERYONE I encounter is a 12th Step call, just as I am most of the time, myself.
If I must treat them all as if they were my beloveds, I am going to walk through the world a more loved and happy person.
There is something wonderful to love in every kid of God’s. I have always known that. We see it all the time. Someone comes into this thing, all beat up and broken, prison record, violent, stealing, lying and cheating. What do we do? We love them till they sober up and begin to become authentic, viable individuals with hope and promise to offer.
Isn’t that the most wonderful thing? I am grateful for the unconditional love proffered to me by those who were around when I came in; sponsors, all the thousands of people I have known over these years. Wow! What a tribe!
And, so, I must let those who have harmed me, and those whom I have harmed, all live in the “sunlight of the spirit” with me, no matter what I think that is. They are here to teach me, and I them. Whether or not we continue our relationships for 5 minutes or 500 years, there is only love.
Dolphin Hug 