March 24

FAITH MONTH: DAY 24: “When every hope is gone, ‘when helpers fail and comforts flee,’ I find that help arrives somehow, from I know not where. Supplication, worship, prayer are no superstition; they are acts more real than the acts of eating, drinking, sitting or walking. It is no exaggeration to say that they alone are real, all else is unreal.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

My faith has evolved from the desperation of giving up, knowing I had NO solutions left. This is a highly spiritual place to be. I get surrendered, over and over, to the idea that I can solve my problems or seeming problems.

I must say that I have few problems. There are always opportunities for me to develop deeper faith. I am convinced that the more I let go of driving the bus, the more faith I am going to experience. What makes life so simple after years of doing this is that the releases come on deeper and deeper levels. I seldom stay awake all night with anything. I once did this 2 or 3 nights of the week.

Now I just know, deep in my soul, that there is nothing I can do or say about most of the things that occur in my life. What a relief! I sleep great and have so little stress that it is awful when I feel like I used to feel nearly every day.

I have faith that my brain is awesome in so many aspects, but that it is like a library where only old ideas can be stored. I create so little with my mind…except chaos and stress and imaginary shit that does no benefit to anyone.

I have so much more time to work with today! The concept of time is completely different. I have no agendas, no cons to run, no situations to control. YAY! Now, I must say that I am still capable of falling prey to the SPM on occasion, and step right back into the insanity. It just does not last like it once did. I am pleased to report that these steps, this faith thing, really, really work! Hooray!

And supplication, making a decision to honor a Power greater than ME is, of course, how my faith puts on its tennis shoes. I have to actively participate in this thing. It isn’t done in my mind…yeah, you try to give these SPM faith! Ha! That is just like a tug-of-war…forget it! So, I don’t do that. I quiet them in meditation.

That is my worship, along with praising the things that go right in my life in a gratitude letter each day. I do not pray, like I said, except to sing the gratitude song or writing that letter. I have nothing to ask for. I do not know what I am supposed to do, anyway.

I just say thank you for help and guidance and love each day. I receive them and thank again the next day. It is like that. And it works. And my lists are longer all the time. I seldom have to wonder what to write. The more I see that is good and fine about my life, the better it gets! How amazing is that???

There are always going to be things that happen in my daily life that feel icky, but I get to sit with them and know that they will pass and answers will come. I do not know when this began to shift for me, I can only say that diligence with practical application of faith has turned the key and opened the lock. And I am grateful and happy for those whose faith uplifted me when mine was shaky. A true gift!

And yes, these are the truths. We all are brought up to believe in money and resources as the “safety net” we must have to protect us, but there is nothing they can do to calm my spirit or feed my soul. I am grateful, today, they are no longer my answer. It was a chase that never ended and never satisfied. I am blessed to be sitting in this chair today, and I know it and love it. This is my new addiction, and I want nothing but more of it!