LOVE MONTH: DAY 21: “And God said ‘Love your enemy,’ and I obeyed him and loved myself.” – Khalil Gibran
I found this quote yesterday, in the middle of “LOVE” month, and it made me cry. I have not read it before; or, if I had, I forgot it in this context. Many of the things I have read over the years have grown in context with the practice of these writings.
There has been an undercurrent in my life that began in early August. It is some stuff that is old and powerful that I did not know would come back to me for processing. And I have been given amazing tools in the work I have embraced. All of it came to me and knocked on my door.
I am constantly amazed at how profound this piece of work has been. The threads of its impact on my entire life have woven in and out of everything that has occurred for me in the last 40 years. A very big piece of my life is being examined in ways I did not know I could sit with.
And, in the doing of this work, I am being given an insight into just how big this event had colored my perception of myself and others and how that has shifted (again!) in the last 4 months for me. I shared some of the “LOVE” month writings with a person who is guiding me through this process, and we both saw the healing that indicates I am ready for the next step of this thing.
I have done this work with quite a few folks, and it is amazing and healing and life-changing, because we get to own something that was taken from us and get to heal. I love healing.
Most of all, I love the healing that allows me to fully hold myself in kindness, love and new perspective. It is the reason I do what I do, both for myself and with others. I am so happy and grateful to feel the shift and to know that I am never, ever done.
I know this is a big piece of my life I am reclaiming, and it feels amazing. The most important shift I have in this particular situation is I have regained my ability to cry. It was something I quit a long time ago, in response to the overwhelm I felt when things kept happening and I had no way to accommodate them in my mind or my heart. I just shut down and stayed that way for a very long time.
And now I can really begin to love who I am and all the messiness that is my life and the love that I truly longed to feel for so long for things that happened and the people that brought these things into my experience. I am grateful for their path and their journey and how it intersected my own.
These are the things I have held apart from my heart for too long. I have seen how broken others have been by their experiences, and it has always been my belief that I could embrace and love all aspects of my life. I think I am getting there.
This is a beautiful quote. I am grateful for the touchstone to my soul it gave me when I read it. And I am grateful for the spiritual principles contained in the 12 steps I have been graced with. Studying and practicing these things has been the journey of love I have never given up on taking.
And, the funny thing is, like every addict; all I want is MORE!
Dolphin Hug 