LOVE MONTH: DAY 4: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.
We may believe that resentment, anger and fear will never leave us. My experience has taught me differently. I must accept these things as being mine. When I do, they have permission to be worked out, processed, and released.
We hate out of fear and ignorance. Once we see humanity as being all of us, equal and precious, we are in that place where we can give love to others without fear and ignorance.
Teaching love is an incredibly challenging task. Most of the truly great teachers who have come to be among us have been killed. Their message was faced with fear and ignorance. That is the vehicle of killing the light.
When we are full of self-inflicted and self-centered fear, we not only drink and drug; but we block the sunlight of the spirit. My prayer is that we may all have peace enough to spread it around.
I have enough to let others be who they are and what they are, without judgment. I must maintain this stance, even in the face of fear and ignorance. That means that I am not here to change haters or to teach them another way.
Unless someone approaches me with the question of how to change that dynamic, I am not in a position to force them to face their fear and anger. When I am in a teaching position, I am going to talk about letting go of fear and learning to love. That is the only thing I am tasked with in this life. If I receive grace and unconditional love, which grants me relief from active addiction, I must be prepared to pass it on. Not just in the rooms of 12-step meetings, but in the world at large.
Imagine the biggest bully you have ever known and pray for his heart to soften and for him to allow a moment of love into it. Then imagine yourself hugging that bully until he releases his fear and anxiety. This is what we are here to do. The steps are so great at giving us the spiritual map we need to remain in recovery. Most of us have a great deal of healing to do…mine is still in process, 30 years down the road. I don’t know how long it takes to heal, but I know I have no other task.
So, as we heal ourselves, the greatest gift we can give to EVERYONE is our unconditional acceptance of them and our unconditional love. It is the healing balm for every broken person on this planet. Trying to control a bully is futile and only increases their fear and ignorance.
Whatever gift I am given is to be shared. When I keep it only for myself, the gift is small and insignificant. One of my gifts is my big mouth…yeah, I know. But if I use it to teach love, how great is that? It decreases the amounts of fear and hate in the world by that small increment. And from there it grows. This is the story we have in AA, because the love of two men for their freedom from active addiction and the possibility of touching other lives with it created what we have today.
So, show off your gifts, let go of your fear. Someone needs to hear your story of love and light. They illuminate the dark and scary places where bullies reign. Go about your day practicing unconditional love for the folks you meet. It will inform and open their hearts. Don’t talk about it, just do it!
Dolphin Hug 