GRATITUDE MONTH: DAY 2: “I have learned over a period of time to be almost unconsciously grateful–as a child is–for a sunny day, blue water, flowers in a vase, a tree turning red. I have learned to be glad at dawn and when the sky is dark. Only children and a few spiritually evolved people are born to feel gratitude as naturally as they breathe, without even thinking. Most of us come to it step by painful step, to discover that gratitude is a form of acceptance.” ― Faith Baldwin
We are more apt to thank the Universe for those things we are happy to receive. I learned many, many years ago that I say thank you for ALL of it. Those things that I am not particularly pleased to have come into my life have taught me the greatest lessons of all.
I am not unconsciously grateful at all. But make it a point to write the things that occur during my day, whether I like them or not. My judgment about what is a gift and what is not is never accurate, so I do not choose which things for which to be grateful.
I am happy to report that my greatest teachers are those who piss me off and/or hurt my feelings most of the time. What I get to do is practice with them, because the practice is only valid when it stretches me the most.
I would not want a spiritual life to be anything other than a challenge to step into a new way of living in and seeing the world around me. That only happens when I am motivated to shift my consciousness away from something that doesn’t please me.
Therefore, I am always grateful for discomfort, unpleasant feelings, things that just piss me off, things that don’t go my way, things that seem to be a gigantic Universal punishment for my past behaviors, whatever the situation.
I understand, on many levels, today, that these are my greatest teachers. If I could only learn when the sun is shining, birds are singing, my pockets are full of money, and life is MY oyster, then I know the Universe would give me all of that; because it has and always will. BUT, the people who irritate me, the times when I am broke, frightened, in pain (whether emotional or physical-it matters not), out of answers and unsure what to do next; this is when I am on the most spiritual of paths. Why?
Because there is only hope. Hope is what drives me to connect with other people, to seek out those broken places in myself that need healing, to maybe call a sponsor and do some work, read, write, meditate, do whatever might “fix” the shit I am in.
An old saying around here is that “pain is the touchstone to recovery” means that we are most motivated by fear, anger, resentment, discontent, pain, etc. If all is well in my world, I seldom do what is needed to move through it to another level of growth. I am content to sit still.
In sitting still while the Universe is moving and changing and shifting, I am certain to hit a wall somewhere in some area of my life. That is a given, because static does not work in a fluent environment. Fish must swim in water; I must continue to move. Even when I think I am being perfectly still, I am not.
My heart is beating, my lungs are breathing in and out, my organs of my body are absorbing nutrients and oxygen, as is my brain. So, to think that I can rest and be still is a complete lie. There is no such thing! Think about it!
Remember the last time you asked for a time out? For a rest period from the work of recovery? Many of us think that way from time to time. But there is no rest period in this thing called life. We just occasionally get to step out of the busy-ness of life to experience the calm and peace that are there for us to have when we are spiritually fit.
That is a different dynamic than when we are escaping the life we need to be part of. If we cannot determine the difference between the two, we need to keep moving into the recovery until we can. I believe that is what the author of the quote means when she says “step by painful step.”
Dolphin Hug 