DISCIPLINE MONTH: DAY 15: “As we grow detached from things, we come (with God’s help) to master our desires, and we give the mastery over to God. Discipline and divine grace heal the intellect and the will of the effects of concupiscence. We can begin to see things clearly.” ― Scott Hahn
This quote is amazing! Not the way I write at all, but it is a beautiful piece of written sculpture to me. I love it very much! Saved it for half a month, because I wanted to write something worthy of this quote.
I cannot, but I am inspired by it to expound in my own way.
We who are recovering addicts have a tendency to become addicted to not only drugs and booze, but ideas (old or new), things, lifestyles, ways of dressing and being, and just about everything we think works for us, whether it does or not.
This is a cultural phenomenon, but we carry it to extremes. It does not mean that we have to have the newest or shiniest thing that comes along every day, it just means that we have to loosen our (fearful) grip on what IS so it can become what WAS.
I still have very fond memories of people, places, things and times in my life; but I have to release them to move forward. We get very stuck and refuse to let go (FEAR!) and cling like hell to the thing that is going down the drain and taking us along with it.
So, discipline is to practice releasing every idea, everything, every moment, every person, all of it back to the Creator who brought it into our lives to begin with.
If I have a great memory of living in a place and being 25 and having a great time, that place has certainly changed since then. I cannot attempt at 50 or 60 to relive that time or believe that I will be the same and have the same experiences in that place. This is the delusion from which I have seen a great deal of suffering.
So, I have to be willing to discipline myself to understand what it means to truly have the mind of “not knowing”. So I need to be open to things changing all the time and not knowing how or what that means for me. I can be anywhere I want to be, but I have to remember to accept it all as the most perfect thing it has become.
Where we really get to see this in action is with our aging processes. I have friends who have become unrecognizable in their quest to look like they did when they were 20 or 30. It doesn’t work. The things they do to make it happen alter their appearance till they don’t look like any version of themselves…it kind of freaks me out. But that is their prerogative, and VERY socially reinforced.
I think it is an amazing aspect of recovery when we can learn to be fully comfortable with exactly who we are and how we are and what our life looks like RIGHT NOW. Not attached to it, but accepting of it. Then when it changes, we walk into acceptance of that and that and that and that. I find this to be the challenge of recovery…opening our hearts and minds to ALL possibilities.
When we truly allow ourselves to unfold, allow life to unfold, allow this amazing Creative Force to unfold, for us, the life we are here to live, we are free! We are happy and the struggle is over. This is the goal, I believe; and the challenge and the beauty of recovery.
Dolphin Hug 