DISCIPLINE MONTH: DAY 2: “The only real difficulty with becoming disciplined is when you buy into the notion that happiness comes at the price of sacrifice. The reality is this: Discipline becomes freedom when you are doing what you love.” ― Shannon L. Alder
When I ask those whom I sponsor to write a daily gratitude letter and to journal, you would think I had asked them to cut off both arms! It is so funny that these simple things, which take about 20-30 minutes, have the capacity to shift our brains from chronic discontent to happiness (over 25% more happiness! For free!)
I just laugh, because the disciplines I have in my life have created a sense of fulfillment, pleasure, joy, happiness and contentment that I NEVER got from any other source, including cocaine and scotch! The daily practice of Step 10 is the same. Allene’s voice rings in my ears: “86, 87, and 88…and answer all the questions out loud.” So I do. This was the most consistent practice I was able to stick with in the beginning. And it never left.
I remember being in the hospital after some rather nasty surgery and being resentful for the meds I had to take and detox off of before I could go home. Then I tried to move my body without them and became happy to have them while I healed for 2 days. Oh!
If I am consistent and persistent with these disciplines, my life is good and I am happy. I can always jump into “wanting” things that I think I would like. I have not been able to go to a concert for over a year…no money…nor do I attend events in the area or go on retreats like I once did. All things I live completely well without. I do not feel like I am missing anything, because I am old enough to know what sticks out as important in my life and I have all of those things.
I am healthy enough to walk for miles every day and go anywhere I want. I can cruise along the beach for hours and find cool rocks and seaglass or just run and chase the peeps and play. This is what I always wanted! I have total joy and freedom in each moment, only because I have done the work for a really long time and am happy with who I am and what I do each day.
I have not had to clean up any big messes in a long time, because I am mindful enough to quit making them. I can sit in my own company without stimulation from outside sources for hours and enjoy watching the crazy antics of the feral cats who live in my yard and protect the butterfly population (which is very large during migration!) from their curiosity.
I am content and complete. And I only do what I love! I don’t do all that I would love to do, but I have a strong suspicion that the Universe is asking me to pay attention to the things in front of my nose instead of running around wanting to be entertained all the time.
Having thoroughly digested and inspected and analyzed Step 3, I am convinced that being at home with myself, loving myself, taking REAL care of myself IS what it looks like when I make that decision. Then I have to stop trying to find ways to get the Universe to give me MY will. That is what I get every day in 86, 87, and 88…
Being still with me is the greatest reward of all! It is the ONLY reason we are brought to this deal…to establish a relationship with a HP and THEN to be able to establish a loving relationship with self. The rest is all ruffles and whipped cream!
Dolphin Hug 