COURAGE MONTH: DAY 24: “A man with outward courage dares to die; a man with inner courage dares to live.” ― Lao Tzu
A month of courage is a great thing for me. I really love the concepts I have written about here so far! It is important for me to remember how courageous we are to just get out of bed each day and live life as well as we do.
We are quitters, most of us. Addiction has so much fear wrapped around our lives that we get completely frozen in non-movement. We have to take action every day to let go of paralyzing fear and into the action or recovery. We are not allowed to sit still and believe that we have done all that there is to do by just showing up. The action I have taken is the recovery I enjoy today. The daily writing and meditating is what keeps me from believing the BS my crazy brain tells me each and every day.
I cannot and would not want to “rest on my laurels” around here. I would still be stuck in what I did those first few years, and it is not enough to be “happy, joyous and free” today.
I love life! I could do this stuff for another 60 or 70 years…I am having so much fun and enjoying being with myself and others THAT much! I found over 60 things for which I am grateful this morning, and that was in the first 10 minutes after I was awake enough to hold my purple pen.
Then I write in my journal about the happenings of the day before and the things I plan for this day and how I feel about all of it. I am excited today, I dug a new garden bed and get to plant some new groceries in it!
I sit in meditation with a clear conscience and enjoy the movie my brain plays for the first 3 or 4 minutes, then breathe for the rest of my sit and have a great time coming into my day.
There were a few blips in my day yesterday, but I am resolute in my journey and have no stress or fear about this day. I may encounter things today that thwart my plans, but I will walk through each moment as it comes, not dredging up past events, nor creating a problem-filled future to give me crazy anxiety.
I came to this deal with all of those crazy attitudes and behaviors we all seem to have. I could not envision a life like this for myself, but today it is here.
I had to trust others and walk through my fear and doubt and self-centered ideas to get here…it was a trip, for sure, through “the valley of death” and terror quite often. Some of it was really, really scary. Sometimes it still is, but I have learned to live, really live! And to quit destroying my life, day after day, with the crap in my brain.
The crap that tells me my life is a train wreck because of you, and you, and you! That There is nothing I need to do to change the way I see things, that it is all on others and how they treat me or behave. I am grateful for the days that I was told how to do that and did it! I am grateful for the past, because it can help those who are here to work this thing, but I get to be reminded of how dearly bought this life is and how much investment I have in being who I have become and how much I F-N LOVE IT!!!!
So my inner Tigger is excited to do this life today and I am happy for another glorious day…no matter what! It is a blessing and a gift for me to be alive today…I hope you all feel the same and get the same thing here I have received. It is worth the work, but only when you DO IT! Thanks Nike… that makes over 61 things! I can go on counting things that have changed my life forever…and being grateful…it is awesome!
Dolphin Hug 