June 4

HUMILITY MONTH: DAY 4: “I have three precious things which I hold fast and prize. The first is gentleness; the second is frugality; the third is humility, which keeps me from putting myself before others. Be gentle and you can be bold; be frugal and you can be liberal; avoid putting yourself before others and you can become a leader among men.” ― Lao Tzu

This quote is SO important for me. I have not been blessed with these 3 precious things. They are all things I must work diligently to embrace and to practice. I was married to a gentle man; he was so inspiring to me (for an outlaw biker!) because his spirit was truly gentle, as was his gigantic heart. I am also not frugal…I have a terrible relationship with money, so am not good at managing my own. I do very well with others’ money, but mine is a wreck! So I practice being practical and wise, but frugal does not quite get onto the spectrum for me. I guess that is why we prize these things…they do not come to me without effort. And humility is not on my radar either…I am most often consumed with self and those things that are not, but should be making me happy. I have to really strive to reach for these things, so I recognize why they are prized and precious. But I have had little or no success in holding them fast, because I find them to be some of the most ephemeral qualities in life. Therefore, this quote is a great one for me to read frequently, because I do want to embrace more fully the practice of these things. If we can become them through the practice of Step 6, then I work it for that outcome. I think that gentleness is such a tremendous thing to experience and have. It was nowhere in my life for a great many years. I did not know any gentle people or any who had that quality about them. Where I found it was in watching my pets when I was a little girl. I would see mama cats and some other animals who were gentle with their babies. I love watching a mama cat carry her babies to safety in their mouths, then wash all the smells off of them. It is so sweet. I see it when I watch how gently a horse noses her baby into a different space, or the careful way they walk around a colt, gently placing each hoof to keep the colt from injury or being stepped on. These qualities of gentleness did not exist in the world where I was living or in the people with whom I interacted. There was a nun in my 2^nd grade class who had a gentle way of being, a kind smile and a quiet voice…I really loved her because she WAS kind and peaceful and gentle. That was so rare to me at that age. Humility is much the same way. I have known several very humble people. One of them was a mentor and friend for about 25 years of this deal. We went on 100s of road trips together, because we were on panels all over So. California and spoke together at a lot of meetings. He was such a humble man and, literally, touched the lives of thousands upon thousands of people in early recovery. We had some great laughs and his humility was so charming and attractive. I dearly loved him. I have known some others who personified these qualities for me. I am grateful for these teachers. I strive to emulate their examples!