May 22

INTEGRITY MONTH: DAY 22: “”I am different from [George] Washington; I have a higher, grander standard of principle. Washington could not lie. I can lie, but I won’t.”  — Mark Twain

I really loved this whole quote, of course. There is such deep truth to the idea that I am capable of terrible things, since I know myself to have done them. I had an interesting conversation with a man yesterday about his crimes and he was terrified that I was judging him. Then he was aghast when I told him that I had friends who were guilty of some of the more heinous crimes and that I spent a lot of time in jails, prisons and mental institutions of incarceration and that I had little or no trouble working with those who had done some really horrific crimes, because I can see their souls. The same man who did not want to be judged was SO deeply into judgment about THAT! Interesting how we are. I have not done all of those things, and have no basis for relating to these people, except through their pain and anguish at being less than who they were created to be. I, too, have been that. This month’s writings have brought me to really examine myself in light of terms that are used in much of the reading I do. There are words that I am not comfortable using, because I believe their concepts are mis-translated in our current vernacular and Western cultural usage. One of these is compassion. While I love the way it is described in many Eastern concepts, it has become misused and somewhat abused. Most people say “compassion” like they say “pity” or “sympathy”. That is very arrogant to me. I cringe when I hear others talk about being compassionate, because they are looking down on the person or situation with which they want to practice this principle. I prefer the word “empathic”, because it is more closely aligned with the principle of “joining”. Compassion says that I offer you my sympathy or pity, and there is little implied about common emotional and mental sense. Empathy means that I am the same as you in this situation; and we are seated side by side in our common pain or joy. I empathically relate to those whose pain is great because of the things that hurt their souls. We all do things that being us terrific pain, because we know we are not in alignment with our spiritual nature or purpose. As I have walked this road of recovery, my empathy for others in psychic pain has grown to include everyone. I no longer have a ruler for good, better, best or bad, worse, terrible. There is nothing that I can find so grievous that I cannot offer empathy to the person who perpetuated it. I see the broken pieces of a persons’ soul, not the thing they have done. This came when I began to open my heart to receive the grace I received here; even though I knew I had none coming; and wanted to learn to live in a way that made me feel deserving of the gift. As this happened, I stopped doing the things that broke my soul and began to teach others to do the same. There is no degree of broken-ness for me…it is ALL painful. I am frightened to see the amount of fear others still have in their hearts when they have done horrible things to others and still harbor beliefs that theirs were crimes that had less pain for the recipients than someone else’s. I am grateful to know that I can walk with empathy with anyone and accept their experiences as having been the touchstone to their own humanity. I, too, have been capable of terrible things, and I hope I never forget that. And I am deeply grateful for a new and higher path today.